Hyperthyroidism

just to give those people that usually ask me what it is

symptoms and effects of hyperthyroidism

Symptoms

• Weight loss - Negative, haha i wish, well its not happening to me
  
• Increased appetite - positive, and trying to diet at the same time will drive you crazy
  
• Nervousness - positive
  
• Restlessness - positive
  
• Heat intolerance - positive
  
• Increased sweating - HELL YEAH!!! i sweat like bacon thrown into the grill
  
• Fatigue - Positive, usually in hot area's and after i do something strenuous
  
• Frequent bowel movements - positive, no comments
  
• Menstrual irregularities in women - uhmm i think you know the answer
  
• Goiter (visibly enlarged thyroid) may be present - Positive
  

Additional symptoms that may be associated with this disease:

• Weakness - Positive
  
• Sleeping difficulty - HELL YEAH!!! MY MAX SLEEP TIME IS 4 hours!?!?!
  
• Clammy skin - positive
  
• Skin blushing or flushing - Negative
  
• Bounding pulse - Positive along with extreme headache
  
• Nausea and vomiting - Positive
  
• Lack of menstruation - uhmm again i think you the answer to this
  
• Itching overall - yup, sometimes the whole day
  
• Heartbeat sensations - yup, every pulse hurts like hell
  
• Hand tremor - well i've had this before, except that its much worse now
  
• Hair loss - thank god thats a negative
  
• Diarrhea - Positive
  
• Breast development in men - i dunno im fat
  
• High blood pressure - YUP!! EVERY FRIGGIN DAY!!!
  
• Protruding eyes (exophthalmos) - Negative

In short this friggin illness has given me nothing, even the hope of losing weight =(

Sick Freak

I know most people know me to be a very sickly person. How sickly is that?

Early this year i had what seemed to be pneumonia, thankfully it was just a false alarm, i had a severe bronchial infection. If the bacteria grew more in numbers and reached most of my lungs, then it would be pneumonia. My infection was like an acute pneumonia, now if you've seen people who have pneumonia, you would notive them coughing a lot due to the mucus caused by the bacteria. In my case its totally different, i would rarely cough but simultanously for about 5 minutes trying to get all those bacteria's out of my lungs, and for the grand finale a small streak of blood. I dunno if some of the guys have ever seen this but as much as possible i try to hide it from anyone, i dont want people pittying me or seeing me like that, specially my students, who would most certainly just be concerned and scared. My case was an acute infection and the symptoms were worse than that of people with pneumonia, but because there wasn't too much white spots in the Xray i was branded with just having acute bronchial infection. Ironic huh? Unfortunately, lately, i guess due to a lot of stress, i've been coughing again, i was on my way home when a bus passed by and i inhaled some of the smoke from the vehicle that made me cough, when i got home i took off my white shirt and noticed something pinkish and redish in my shirt, i checked it out, it was blood, i checked my body for any wounds and nothing came out, then i notice my palm also had some blood, i tried to dismiss the fact that i might have the infection again. A week later was cookfest with the students, again i inhaled some smoke, and again coughed, i saw blood on my palm, which kinda freaked me out...

Around June, when my infection was starting to heal and i was recovering from it, i realized something different in me. Before, i have no records of having allergic reactions except for strong antibiotic and penicillin. During these times, i was allergic to nearly everything namely dust, chicken, shrimp, medicine and etc, but what really pissed me off was that im allergic to my own sweat. And within a couple of weeks red big spots have developed in my chest area, and they were really hideous. I consulted a dermatologist regarding my condition and she said i might be developing skin asthma and these may be the early stages. Till now my chest looks like a rotten carcass from all the scars and all the red spots. I've tried many different medications and it just wont go away....

Next...

Around last week i went to the clinic complaining about a headache, the doctor asked me if i had sufficient sleep, and i answered no, she said maybe its because of stress that im experiencing headaches. She took my blood pressure and said my BP's at the high boundary and she said that it was caused by lack of sleep, i accepted the verdict and went home to get some rest. The next day i had an even worst headache, but i tried to endure it thinking i badly need the hours to get my practicum done, and i really want to graduate. Towards the later part of the day i experienced blackouts, although i wasn't knocked unconscious, anytime it happens i feel my knees go weak, my feet go numb, and everything turns black, although i still have the 4 remaining senses. After 3 of these i went to the clinic and was diagnosed with high blood again, they asked me to go home and have some rest. The next day just after reporting to the clinic to have my fit to work form, its the form where the clinic certifies that you are in good shape, they checked my blood pressure and it was very high, too high to get the doctors face really worried actually, but the weird thing was that i wasn't feeling anything bad, everything was normal. So again i was sent home but this time i had a request slip to go see a cardiologist and a doctor of internal medicine. I called one of my students mother who happens to work in chinese general hospital, and asked if she knew such a doctor, and i was scheduled immediately after i told her what happened for the past few days, upon getting there, the guy ran some test and told me i have hypertension and high blood pressure, and a tentative hyperthyoidism, and that some more tests should be done to make sure there would be no underlying illness and complications. I wasn't allowed to report to work, and seeing days just pass by and do nothing instead of working kinda got me depressed because it would only mean more hours and working sundays for me up ahead. I already have the test results in hand but guess what? The doctor was out for a vacation and out for all saints day schedules. so i had to postpone my work to next week. I went to his clinic early monday morning, eager to have him write me a note that i am taking medication and i can already report for work, after checking some results, he said that the results are bad and asked for some more tests. For the next 2 days i ran some more blood test to check my values, and it was unstable. He then referred me to another doctor that has more experience with these situations, so i went to see that doctor late that afternoon, and again a lot more tests, but this time she said its 80% sure that i have hyper thyroidism. She also noted that my blood sugar level is very unstable, and that i might develop diabetes soon.

So here i am, waiting for the results, still feeling sick, still having the worse headache's, can't sleep at night due to very strong heart palpitations, heck even jome was surprised at the gym how strong it can go, waiting for what else can go wrong with my body

My Birthday!!!

Hmm.. to get things started.. just to let you guys know i haven't had my birthday celebrated on a Scout Saturday. This is my first time to celebrate my birthday without having it scheduled the same week as the long exams. So I was anticipating a day of just spending time with my students ( those that are close to me ) and of course the gang!!

The day started when my mobile rang, it was cobbs waking me up to get ready. So i hurriedly went to the bathroom and did my daily rituals, after i got out, I checked on the digicam hoping that it would work this time. So the day started with me telling myself " DAMN NO PICTURES!!! and i only have a few minutes left to spare till cobbs fetches me up. Then i heard someone outside the house blowing his horn. DAMN ITS COBBS HE's EARLY. So i took as much as i can uniform, necker, slides and all that other stuffs. So we went to yo's place and picked him up. When i got to grace a lot of people greeted my happy birthday. I was kinda expecting it because i've been getting that for the whole week and even after my birthday people still greet me weird huh? o.O Anyways the first student that greeted me was my favorite grade 3 student clarise haha too bad she didn't know it was my birthday and she thought me and the seniors were just pulling her leg. So the day went on like the usual inspection except that today i cant keep still i keep on moving and doing some stupid things. I dont know if its because of excitement for the party later or just because im plain happy. So the inspection went but this time before we started the inspection, the troop started to sing happy birthday. After that we went to jollibee and ate breakfast. We came back at around 9:30 to 10:00 where the General assembly was just about to begin. The students again greeted my happy birthday and they sang the song AGAIN!! To cut things short, 90% of the programs ended with me and my day having something to do with it. I didn't expect things to go that far. At this point i was given a laminated cardboard with all of a girls troops signature. And me? happy! After nearly all of the program ended and by this time hearing the birthday song was already torture, we gave outs awards took a couple of pictures. Then before they really ended the assembly my closest students came up to me and gave a birthday cake, an ace water spa coupon, a lot of post it messages, and a lot more. And me? VERY FRIGGIN HAPPY!! After that we went to my place and i took my car and started to drive students to my place. Well we had fun, watched the grudge, some played mah jong, some played poker, some played mp3 with the loud speaker, some just ate and some did spin the bottle. So i guess everyone's happy. At around 6 we ate early dinner, and after that i started to drive kids home. DAMN IT WAS TOO DAMN TRAFFIC!! I got stuck trying to drive 2 students home who's houses are no less than 10 kilometers. So as usual i started whining and complaining about traffic but im happy i had a student that accompanied me just to drive those two students home beside me, at least i have someone i can talk to, actually its the twins. So instead of complaining we just interviewed toni to prep her up for the upcoming college exams, and talked about nearly everything under the sun. We passed directly beside SM Edsa and traffic was even worst. Suddenly i heard a noise i thought someone hit our car, so i looked around then my students looked up and guess what. THERE WERE FIREWORKS!!! AND IT WAS LAUNCHED RIGHT BESIDE OUR CAR!! TALK ABOUT PERFECT TIMING!! So i told myself " wow thanks God thanks for the day and the fireworks" . So we watched the fireworks unmindful that there were already no cars in front of us, dropped the 2 students home safely, and went to starbucks Tomas Morato to meet elmo, its been a long time since i saw and talked to that guy. So we drove back to my place and it was already around 10, dropped another set of students, got back had some scotch to drink and ate some more food, chatted with my guests and again drove another set of students and that the end

HMM people to thank

TO YO: i know you're part of the planning crew hehe, and i know the students had a lot of hlep from you Thanks
TO Aidz: Thanks for the transpo times, and being there early
TO Jome: Thanks also for the transpo times, and thanks for the ice cream, i still have them on the freezer damn there a lot of them i can't finish them till now, specially sa last part of keeping me awake while driving home some people
TO Cobbs: Thanks for dropping by and bringing carl
TO Steph and Tiff: thanks for accompanying thru out all those traffic and driving times
TO Angeli: Thanks for siding with me against Eman
TO Eman: Thanks for showing up black boy!!! Did you have a hard time talking to Elmo? MWHAHAHA and thanks for taking time off your work just to come
TO Michelle: Thanks for the efforts you put into the surprise
TO Jho and Ainz: the masterminds of the surprise, thanks sooo much, i know you two have put a lot of effort into this, and sorry that i was always there in grace that you weren't able to push through with your plans
TO Toni: thanks for playing stars-Callalily all day hahaha just kidding, Thanks for coming i know you went through a lot of sermon just to get here
TO Alyanna: thanks for the gift and making the party a lot more fun
TO Shaw and Christine: thanks for coming even though you have projects due the week after
TO Suzie and peterson: MWAHAHA take it easy, but thanks for coming narin, and sa gift na nasira ko na ata hahaha sowi...
TO Chew Ven, and Raen: thanks sa pagpunta i know lately you guys are busy with work
TO Allen: woohoo and addict na di na napansin 5 minutes nang nandun si elmo haha, thanks for coming derecho pa galing work
TO Keith: thanks for coming and taking care of ven and chew's transpo
TO Gawch: Sa susunod meron tripping tagalan mo naman hahaha

The Ghost Inside the House

Its been 3 months since i first moved to this house permanently, yet i still don't feel at home. I remember during the construction period, workers would tell me to be carefull about supernatural beings in the house. One of the workers fell from the fire exit, got both his knees shattered and bones broken. He told us it wasn't an accident, saying that he's not that clumsy to fall off the hole from the third floor. He told us that while painting the wall, he heard foot steps behind him. Thinking that it was only his co-worker he didn't bother looking back, by the time he had to soak his brush, he was surprised it was already beside him. So he turned back to thank the guy, and he was shocked to see a black lady without a head, he was frozen in fear. Then the black lady moved towards him, thats the time he jumped off the hole. So you think its not true? Try calling the owners of Star Construction Company. The next story happened just a month before actually completing the house. The workers were all trying to relax so they had beer that night. Then one of the drunk ones mumbled about seeing a lady cross though the door way. The head electrician laughed out loud and said in a raised voice "If ever that lady shows up to me tonight im gonna make love and make her feel other kinds of pleasure". The next day we heard that he was dead, the doctors can't explain what happened there were no signs of struggle. Its as if he choked on his own saliva or his heart suddenly stopped. Then his roomate approached and told us his whole experience that night. They slept beside each other. Everything was normal. In his sleep he started to have nightmares, but not just any nightmare. In his dream he was staring at a mirror, then suddenly a figure appeared. It was a white lady, from the mirror it approached them. He can't see the face but he was sure it was staring at him. The whitelady moved towards his partner, and placed her hand around his neck. His partner woke up and started shouting crying for help. In his dream both of them can't move their bodies, and both of them were crying out of fear and for help. He told me that it took a long time before the next thing happen. The whitelady started choking his roomate. He saw everything, the struggle down to the last pose his roomate was struggling. The white lady looked at him and walked away. Then he woke up and saw his roomate dead and cold with the same pose in the dream.

I don't really believe in ghost but because of the events that happened i payed more attention on the things around me.

The other night I was playing in my computer, as usual trying to improve my playing efficiency. Then i remembered our neighbor who used to peek though our window, which she was. So i decided to close the windows and blinds. After an hour i was curious if she was still peeking. So i moved slowly to the windows and quickly pulled a small part of the vertical blinds. I didn't see our neighbor but instead i saw a scary face. I fell down my computer chair and went back to the other end of the room. When i finally got the courage to take a look again, i approached the mirror again, this time thinking what i can do if it is still there. Somehow i manage to hold the blinds, and i told myself, im going to see it again anyway in some other form so what not approack it. I pulled the blinds back and i saw the figure again!!. But this time it was quite familiar. Then i punched the wall. DAMN!! REFLECTORIZED WINDOW!!! i forgot the our windows reflect on the side where there is more light. HAHAHA End of story.

Bad Dreams...

It was a lazy sunday, a bit sunny, woke up from bed, strecthed a bit. Changed into something as if we were going somewhere classy( i don't know why...). Took the tricycle to the main road, took a jeep to her streets corner. I walked past the usual market, thinking about years past, where i would wait for her to walk 2 blocks and meet her before going to school. Finally got to her house, rang the doorbell, but still not working. She came out to open the door. I walked past their dogs, but this time one was missing. Everything was still the same, the gate, the softdrink crates, the empty aquarium, the garden, even that aluminum screen door. I felt comfortable knowing nothing much has changed. She hurried to sit at the sofa, she was watching an art film. I sat close to her, bent over and told her "welcome back, i miss you". We talked like before, where we would throw each other names, and argue endlessly over something silly. Suddenly she stands up and slaps me hard, and says "didn't i tell you we're over? so stop daydreaming. And whats that "i miss you thing for!?". I was stunned, but somehow i didn't react as if i was expecting it, then she grabs a tiny cigar and lights it up. "Its so hot here, and whats taking them so long?" she said. She went up and started taking a bath. I browsed thru the channels, somewhat my hands keep trembling as in im scared of something thats going to happen. I hear steps of someone going down the flight of stairs, i went to take a look, it was his little brother. Seconds later i see her a bit irritated, "where's my shoes!? my big sister took it going to church?". I took a closer look at her, she had brown contact lens put on, her hair as usual wet messed a bit, her face a shade darker than the last time i saw her. She finishes her cigar and puts it on the ash tray, and started to prepare her things. I sat down the chair and stared at the cigar, suprised that she was already smoking. I asked her "since when did you start smoking? don't you know its bad for you? "Since when did you care? all you give me is crap and all that shit, stop talking like you know everything" she replied. I was quiet, wanting to say somthing but i can't, i have the right words to argue with her, but my mouth won't move. Then i recieve a text, " we're here outside already". We went out, i opened the door for her, but she slams it shut after getting in. The car started moving, everyone was asking her questions, i wanted to ask her some questions and join in but i thought i can ask them later. The topic suddenly shifted to me. They were talking about me hanging on for so long, hanging on when i know she already has a boyfriend abroad. Then i hear a voice saying "Its him and his students. He believes so much in them hoping one would return, and look at the results, it just made scouting worst". We parked and got off at moomba's. We looked for a couch, and settled down. As we we're ordering, i saw two among our group was making out. Its the same people but something has changed. It seems like everyone was already succesfull. I started thinking if this is what success makes out of people. We talked had a few cocktails. I tried to look, trying to see whats different. Everyone changed from being nice people to these people i no longer know.

Girl #1 changed from being rooted to chinese to hating her family. She's now successful but blames her mother for her current boyfriend. She hated the time when she was always judged by what her mom would think her dates.

Girl #2 still naive and still innocent was now hooked with an old time friend back in highschool, but this time she was having a hard time struggling with her relationship and work. She was wearing a long sleeved polo shirt, but i saw a mark in her wrist, the kind you get when attempting to commit suicide.

Girl#3 had serious relationships with her boss'. She kept talking even if people we're no longer interested. All i hear from her is her guys and her sex life.

Girl#4 still one of the boys, came back from the states, nothing much with her changed.

Boy#1 still feeling like most gurls like him, talks too much about himself and brags how he can get any girl he likes.

Boy#2 still sarcastic, still happy, but you can see he has lost some of that now, he separated from his parents due to conflicts of interests

Boy#3 now managing a bigger network, still a little bit naive, and still single, hated girls due to some bad experience

Towards the end of the conversation i knew that, one of the guys no longer joined us because of the recent breakup. And we would still meet up when it comes to LAN games.

From that point i was very confused, then i heard that after dinner we would go visit 2 of our friends...

We drove to a funeral parlor, both were on two different rooms... I took a closer look to see their faces, also trying to see if this is all real. There he was, just a little older. I cried because he never got to see his dream, he was always busy with his work trying to improve his family's living. I walked over to the other room. I saw his name, and remembered all those days in high school just wasting time talking to people telling the same old jokes over and over again. Its been a long time since i talked to him and seeing him in his current state makes me guilty for not being there often. I bent over to see his face and remember some of the good times, but someone's face just kept on popping in. The person who he loved before wasn't there. Then i saw her face talking to the rest of the gang feeling no remorse of what happened. It was during one evening when both guys decided to go ahead because each had work the next day, and partially because he saw his gurl come to the party with another guy making out. They met a car accident afterwards and its our first time to visit them since the accident happaned. It grieved me because it was already the last day before they are to be buried.

We went home. The next day i prepared myself for work. As i went through my usual routine commuting towards work, my head was still filled with the events that happened trying to understand why. I turned on my discman and started to listen to some old music about how life is. As i was crossing a bus hit me trying to beat the red light. I was thrown to the side of the avenue. People hurried over, i felt relieved that i might still get a chance hospital. Then when they reached me they hurried over for my wallet and my valuables. I lay there helpless feeling each and every part of my body aching, but i still kept thinking about my life. Is this how it would end? I layed there for what seems to be hours until slowly everything turned black. Even though i can't see anything, my mind kept on thinking about my family, about her, my friends, and my students, wishing i could do something, wishing i could correct all my mistakes during the time i was alive. Then even my mind was blank, i can no longer think of anything, i can't remember anything, and the pain became worst that it seemed like hours... I started to panic and told me self its only a dream wake up, i tried everything, but i lay there injured in my dream.

Finally my mom woke me up from my sleep. My cellphone was still beeping. I woke up sweating all around. My body unusually warm and my heart beat real fast. Even now i can still remember that dream, it was so real that even now im scared to even sleep again....